Sunday, March 7, 2010

King And Queen Skit

Materials:
costumes for king, queen, princess, gatekeeper, suitor

Characters:
king, queen, princess, gatekeeper, suitor

Directions:
You will need two people and the script memorized:
(#1 picks up broom stick and stands to right of chair. #2 is offstage to the right.)

#1: For this evening's entertainment, we offer you this cultural classic, currently captivating crowds across the country at finer dinner theaters and thespian gatherings.
Without further ado, we bring you, "The Marriage of the Princess". Please enjoy.

(#2 enters, riding a horse, and gallops up to the door.)
#2: Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. Whoa.
#2: Knock, Knock, Knock.
#1: (as doorman) Yes, may I help you?
#2: I want to marry the princess!
#1: I'll have to ask the King.
(#1 slowly turns around while #2 runs behind him, sits down, and puts the large pot on his head. He is now the King.)

#1: King?
#2: Yes?
#1: There is a man at the door who wants to marry your daughter, the princess.
#2: Oh, I'll have to ask my wife, the Queen, now won't I?
(slowly turns as #1 drops his staff, sits down, and puts on the small pot. He is now the Queen and should use an appropriate voice.)

#2: Queen?
#1: Yes, what is it?
#2: There is a man at the door who wants to marry our daughter, the princess.
#1: Well, we must ask her then, mustn't we?
(turns as #2 sits in last chair and puts kerchief over head. He is the Princess.)

#1: Princess?
#2: Yes, mother?
#1: There is a man at the door who wishes to marry you.
#2: Hmmm, tell him, No Thank You.
#1: I see.
(#2 becomes King.)

#1: She says 'No Thank You'.
#2: I see.
(#1 becomes doorman)

#2: She says 'No Thank You'.
#1: I see.
(#2 becomes knight)

#1: She says 'No Thank You'.
#2: Darn!
#2: Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. (exits stage)

#1: (to audience) A few days later...

(#2 enters, riding a horse, and gallups up to the door.)
#2: Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. Whoa.
#2: Knock, Knock, Knock.
#1: (as doorman) Yes, may I help you?
#2: I want to PLEASE marry the princess!
#1: I'll have to ask the King.

#1: King?
#2: Yes?
#1: There is a man at the door who wants to PLEASE marry your daughter, the princess.
#2: Oh, I'll have to ask my wife, the Queen, now won't I?

#2: Queen?
#1: Yes, what is it?
#2: There is a man at the door who wants to PLEASE marry our daughter, the princess.
#1: Well, we must ask her then, mustn't we?

#1: Princess?
#2: Yes, mother?
#1: There is a man at the door who wishes to PLEASE marry you.
#2: Hmmm, tell him, No Thank You.
#1: I see.
(#2 becomes King.)

#1: She says 'No Thank You'.
#2: I see.
(#1 becomes doorman)

#2: She says 'No Thank You'.
#1: I see.
(#2 becomes knight)

#1: She says 'No Thank You'.
#2: Darn!
#2: Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. (exits stage)

#1: (to audience) A few days later...

(#2 enters, riding a horse, and gallups up to the door.)
#2: Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. Clippity-Clop. Whoa.
#2: Knock, Knock, Knock.
#1: (as doorman) Yes, may I help you?
#2: I am here to marry the princess, and I won't take NO for an answer!
#1: I'll have to ask the King.

#1: King?
#2: Yes?
#1: There is a man at the door who wants to marry your daughter, the princess, and he won't take NO for an answer.
#2: Oh, I'll have to ask my wife, the Queen, now won't I?

#2: Queen?
#1: Yes, what is it?
#2: There is a man at the door who wants to marry our daughter, the princess, and he won't take NO for an answer.
#1: Well, we must ask her then, mustn't we?

#1: Princess?
#2: Yes, mother?
#1: There is a man at the door who wishes to marry you, and he won't take NO for an answer.
#2: Hmmm, tell him, No Thank You.
#1: I see.
(#2 becomes King.)

#1: She says 'No Thank You'.
#2: I see.
(#1 becomes doorman)

#2: She says 'No Thank You'.
#1: I see.
(#2 becomes knight)

#1: (doorman) She says 'No Thank You'.
#2: (knight) I said I won't take NO for an answer - stand aside or die!
(pulls his sword)
#1: Go right in, sir!
(knight gives him the sword as he walks by and sits down as king.)

#2: (king) She said 'No Thank You'.
#1: (knight) I said I won't take NO for an answer - stand aside or die!
(pulls his sword)
#2: Go right in then!
(knight gives him the sword as he walks by and sits down as queen.)

#1: (queen) She said 'No Thank You'.
#2: (knight) I said I won't take NO for an answer - stand aside or die!
(pulls his sword)
#1: Go right in then!
(knight gives him the sword as he walks by and sits down as princess.)

#2: (princess) I said 'No Thank You'.
#1: (knight) I said I won't take NO for an answer - will you marry me?
#2: Well, Yes then!

#1: (to audience) And, they lived happily ever after.

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